hephaestion2014's blog

"So you straight or gay?"

Well, I tend to get fed up of this question. Not because of the fact that it's a question that forces us to reduce our identity down to one thing, but also because of the assumption about wrestling behind it.

If you answer straight, automatically both parties know that the wrestling is going to be just wrestling. No funny business. But if you answer gay, there's an assumption you might be up for the more erotic style.

Which is a huge assumption and one that isn't really all that correct. I have wrestled numerous guys who identify as gay that haven't been looking for the erotic part, because they are either in a relationship etc, or more importantly because they just enjoy wrestling for the male bonding or serious about wrestling as just a sporting activity.

"So you like Rugby? You straight or gay?"
If the guy answers he is gay, you are not going to assume mid tackle, he's going to pull down your rugby shorts and start to grope you in the middle of the match. Well, not outside of porn. The same with tennis, or soccer or long distance running.

I wish people would ask instead, "you looking for erotic or non erotic wrestling?"

It's more precise, and an accurate way to discover what both guys are really looking for, and not assuming that a shared sexuality means a shared universal goal in wrestling.

But be honest in your answer, if you say you don't want to do erotic, don't go changing your answer halfway through..